Wednesday, May 07, 2008

here's the thing

I'm depressed.
I'm completely unhappy with my life.
And it's all because I have refused to take the risks necessary towards my happiness... I have been forced to take the happiness out of my life because it's not...
the proper way of doing things.

I'm done with the proper way of doing things.

Kelly and Raymond have worked me pretty hard. They don't know they have, but they have. Raymond had me in tears tonight. Just soul tears; the kind that come when your soul is crying because someone spoke the truth to you and you can't handle it with words... your spirit is responding under all of the sh*t you've buried it under, screaming out in salt water communication: "I'm here. I'm still here, and I'm listening."

Raymond killed me tonight.

And then he hit me with "I love you" and the more he said it, the more I cried.

I'm moving to chicago.

Thought you all should know.


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