Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Buying for Banafsheh, 101

It's the holiday season, so I expect some folks might think of me as they shop.

That said, I've included this handy buying tip for when you reach for that Lord of the Rings calendar, you'll know to put it back and get the original print of the books (if not original, at least early enough that it hasn't got the movie representations all splashed on the cover).

Tip #1: I like practical.
Every present I've ever given is something someone can use in some way; either something that will help them make a statement, provide an image, or tools in order to continue a dream. In that vein, I don't like stuff... I have enough random stuff of my own, and to get more stuff frustrates me cause I have to house and make room for just one more thing I can't actually get any use out of.

Tip #2: I like original.
Say some idiotic studio wants to do Casablanca again. Do not buy me anything to do with the new movie. I won't like it. Say the studio actually manages to make a great movie, and I end up liking the new movie in spite of myself. Don't but me anything to do with the new movie. Still get the original poster, or the original film.

Tip #3: I like Vintage.
This kinda ties into Tip #2, with this slight difference: Using the LotR example from before, if you got me a book series without movie images, that's Tip #2. However, if you got me the 1954 original print, I'd simply die.

Tip #4: Collectibles.
I do not go for collectibles, because people do not know what collectibles are. Original is not always collectible. Vintage is. An original, vintage, never opened He-Man is way cooler than the beefcake, overdone, why-can-I-count-the-veins-on-a-toy crap they've got now. Remade stuff now is just kitschy, and won't sell, or mean anything in 20 years. Now, again using the LotR example, the original, animated Bilbo Baggins movie is a collectible. A dvd of this would fall under original. A VHS would fall under vintage, but I wouldn't be able to get much use of it, so the dvd works just fine.

Tip #5: Theater.
THIS WILL ALWAYS WORK. If all else fails, go the theatrical route. Tickets, plays, musical scores, vintage playbills... be creative. I guarantee it'll work. If you screw this up, there's no helping you. Seriously.

Tip #6 Like vs. Love.
If there's something I like, unless you purchase it immediately after I mention it, I will not like it. I will have had time to move on and like something else. If I love it, and it always comes up in conversation, or you know for a fact I'll love it, get it. But if it's like... something that... I have a choice between... How do I explain? If there's a boy band, or a group, and I single out a member as being my favourite, don't get me his calendar. It's not that serious. It's just that of my choices, he's the favourite. That's all. Unless it's noel gallagher, and even with him, I'm stuck between being over him and never getting over him. I think I can sum up our non-existent relationship with: I'll always love him, but I don't have anything of his and I'm very okay with that.

Tip#7 Music.
You can't go wrong with legends. My entire music collection was stolen in the move from Pittsburgh to DC, so I don't have anything.

I think this is good for our introduction of buying for banafsheh.

b

1 comment:

City Love said...

sooooo
i'll just never shop for you ever and i'll give you a visa giftcard instead cause damn.